


Eddworld

by IWannaBeAWriter



Category: Eddsworld
Genre: Angst, Crossover, Depression, Edd - Freeform, Eddsworld - Freeform, Eddsworldangst, Ew, F/M, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Matt - Freeform, Monster Tom, Multi, Oneshot, Poly, Purge, Sad, Self-Harm, eddsworldcrossover, eddsworldoneshots, oneshots, tom - Freeform, tord - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-08-11 06:01:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 14,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16470104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IWannaBeAWriter/pseuds/IWannaBeAWriter
Summary: Just one shots I made, I hope you enjoy! Feel free to request!





	1. Hopeless, Stupid Tom

**Author's Note:**

> Please be aware, if you experience any of these things in this book, stop reading.

   

     Contains self-harm! So please if you are uncomfortable or triggered by this, I hope you skip.

 

Tom either had a good day or a bad day it was his luck of the draw. He would know what type of day it was when he wakes up in the morning, today's was not a good day

His spiky bedhead was buried deep in his pillows. It felt like his whole body weighed a thousand pounds. Tears rolled down his cheeks, soaking his sheets in untold misery.

He mentally punched himself, he was crying. Why is he such a goddamn baby? Sure life has its ups and downs, but he likes to think that his life is pretty good. He has two loving friends who would die for him, and vice versa. So why? Why is his body so sad.

Tom stewed in his thoughts till a soft, comforting knock played against his door. "Tom? It's one in the afternoon, are you alright?" Edd asked, not even attempting to hide the concern layered in his voice.

Edd and Matt were well aware of his situation, often saving him from doing stupid stuff. He hated making his friends worry.

Tom groaned, forcing a reply from his throat. "Yeah, I'm ok." His voice was gruff, hiding the fact he wanted to cry and break down.

But doing that would make a lot more drama then what Tom wanted. It took willpower Tom didn't know he had to roll himself off the bed. Untangling himself from the stone grip of the comforter, as of it was begging him not to leave.

Freeing himself from the clutches of his bedsheet, his butt slamming the floor with an obnoxious thump. His legs so tired they weren't even bothered to catch his body.

"Tom? Everything ok?" Edd asked from behind the closed door, guess he never left, so much for not making them worry.

The man groaned. Rubbing his sore behind, the pain gone almost as soon as it came, what a shame. "Yeah...Just fell off my bed." He didn't bother lying, if he was caught, things wouldn't go well.

Tom sat up from the carpet floor, reaching his arm under his bed, pulling out a bottle of Smirnoff. He didn't hesitate to pop the thing and take a swig. He rubbed his temples, god what has he become? Sitting alone in a dark room, the only light coming from the cracked window, here he was drinking away his problems at 1 in the afternoon.

Edd and Matt liked to say his drinks go 'missing'. He never gets mad about them tossing it though, sometimes he's thankful. That someone could care about him so much, he would never tell them that though, Matt would probably get an even bigger head.

Taking another sip, the drink burned in his mouth. He smiled, it made him feel alive.

Once he was satisfied, he rolled the beverage under the bed once again, he kept this one for Emergencies, he wouldn't let Edd take this one.

He stood up, looking his body up and down. He only had his eyes for reference. He took out the mirrors a few weeks ago, he hated looking at himself. Looking at his old wounds and scars, it was scary.

     When Matt and Edd found out about his disgusting habits, they would cradle him, shower him with love, told him how much they cared.

 

That was then, this is now.

 

     He tucked his blue hoodie on and stalked out the door and out into the hall. Only to be met with his Cola loving friend, their faces to close for comfort.

    Tom's face was twisted into a mix of anxiousness, he could feel Edds breath against his cheek. Both their faces were a flush of red.

     Edd recovered from the semi awkward interaction before Tom, shifting away as subtly as he could. But Tom noticed, and it stung.

     "To-Tom?" How long has he been waiting at his door anyway? "Matt made breakfast, your foods downstairs."

     Tom nodded, his brain not even mustering up the will for a reply. Let alone thanking his friends for making breakfast, waiting behind his door, making sure he was ok, not even a thank you.

     He's acting like such a ungrateful brat who's going though their teenage Emo stage.

     The spiky haired man made a beeline to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him, echoing though the house no doubt. Edd cringed at the lack of response and the sudden sound.

     His whole body was shaking, it felt like the room was spinning as he shrunk to his knees, his eyes predicting an untold amount of tears.

     He was fine till he saw Edd, he was so close to his face, their noses almost touching. He could feel his face heating up all over again.

     His hands flew up to his hair, pulling aggressively, he wanted the pain to stop. He wanted to stop freaking out about the smallest things. Why did he shut Edd out? Nothing would sound better then having Matt and him in his arms.

 

No. He didn't deserve them.

 

     Tom wants so badly to control himself. Stop whinnying like a Norwegian bitch, clean himself up, and join his friends who no doubt were waiting for him.

     They shouldn't have to make him food, and to drag him out his room so he doesn't drink himself to death.

     To many thoughts. To  many questions he will never have the answer too.

     He needed a drink, but their is a strong chance Edd was still outside, and would likely stop him.

     Seeing no other way, he rolled up his sleeve. His skin was gross. He wouldn't use any other way to describe it. Two large scars trailed from his forearm down to his wrist. He faintly smiled, he remembered the exact day.

     He was stressing out, no idea why. Just freaking out for no particular reason. He just wanted to grip his emotions, the thoughts of messing up, being annoying, not being enough caused him to do it.

     Edd has already taken away his razors at this time, helping him shave when needed. He tried his hardest to keep them out of it, too not drag them into his petty problems and worthless issues. When his closest friends, no family found out, it was the last straw.

     So he dug his nails into his arm, dragging them up and down, up and down as hard as he could.

   At first his skin turned a light red, then dark red, then bits and pieces of flesh borrowed under his nails as he broke skin.

     The blood, it was beautiful, making streams that dripped in a dance down his limb and onto the floor. When he was younger, he hated blood, would faint at the sight of it actually, now he can't get enough.

     Tom sighed, the snot and tears drying up, running a stressed hand though his hair. Those wounds have closed, the blood dried up, the scars the only proof that it ever even happened. Edd was pissed when he found out what happened. Not bothering to tell Matt because they both knew he couldn't handle it.

     An idea sparked in Tom's head. Something he could get away with.

     He turned the knob on the facet, cranking it to the highest temperature possible. "Tom? Breakfast is ready." Edd reminded him. Tom jumped at the sound. He obviously hasn't been there the whole time though, because he would have heard Tom's breakdown and put a stop to it as soon as it started.

      "Be right down! Just washing my face." Tom lied though his teeth, it was for the best.

     No reply, he bought his excuse. The mirror began to fog, steam escaping from the sink. Tom grinned. It was ready.

     He slowly moved his exposed arm under the water. A hiss of pain escaped his lips. It felt as if his whole arm was scolding, it was awful. He let go of a breath he didn't know he was holding. Focusing on anything but the water, he took note of the whines, tears, and mumbling he was doing.

     He yanked back his arm once he was satisfied, his burning arm was peeling of brunt off skin, a heavy smell in the air that reminded him of burning hair. It was disgusting.

     Blood ran down his fingertips and into the sink. The only thing that caused him from not having another breakdown or pulling his arm away was one, warped thought.

 

I deserve this.

 

     He howled in pain, bitting down as hard as he could on his lip, trying his hardest to be as quiet as possible as he wrapped, cleaned, and took care of the injuries.

Nobody could know, nobody would really understand. Hell, he barley understood, but he knew what he was doing was right.

     So he dried his tears, cleaned up his mess, actually cleaned his face with cold water and walked downstairs, a bright smile on his face.

     "Tom you took a while, what were you doing?" Matt asked. He already they were gonna ask questions, he was prepared.

     "Picking out tomorrows outfit." Matt squealed, happy with his answer. But they knew better, clothes and self presentation wasn't very high on Tom's to do list. Edd, did not buy his excuse.

     "What happened to your arm?" He asked, clear suspension in his tone, he could see the bandages under his hoodie. This caught Matt's attention.

     Tom smiled, "Just burned myself on the stove cooking dinner last night."

     They let it go after that, but deep down, they knew something wasn't right. But it was easier to pretend that it was. They were just as scared as Tom, if not more.

     Tom will smile, pretend everything is alright. But his life means nothing, but those two mean everything. And if pretending everything is alright will make them happy, then that's what he'll do.


	2. Missing Matt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tom, Edd, and Matt are being hunted.

Blood stains, body's, and cries for help hung heavy in the air. Matt, Edd, and Tom we're responsible for all the death in their hometown. The place they grew up in now belonged to the Red Army. If only they compiled to his demands.

2 Weeks Earlier

 

"Oh Shit!" Tom yelped, his regular show of Cats In Space being interrupted by the satanic grin of their old 'friend' Tord.

"Edd! Get in here!" His summoned friend entered the living room at the sound of distress. Being covered head to toe in batter, sugar, and whatever the hell went into the now cooking muffins. Edds body jolted at the sight.

Tord has half his face burned to a crisp red, his arm being replaced with a hunk of metal. His name tag on his blue jacket read, REDLEADER, in all caps. Two men stood by his side, Pal and Patrick.

"If you are listening to this, then you are currently living in England, [Blank], and congratulations! You are a new part of the Red Empire!" His tone told them this was nothing to celebrate. "All men and boys over 14, surrender yourself to the Army. Anyone who doesn't join will be killed." The glare in his eyes left everyone knowing, that this is their only warning.

   Pal and Patrick stepped out of frame, returning with a beaten and bruised man and women. Dragging them by their hair they tied them down to two chairs, completely ignoring their sobbing pleas.

   Tord movedtowards the women, poking her tear-stained face. Tom cringed, the same gesture that Tord used to do to him.

   "This spy travels though my ranks, selling information to the enemy." He slid a gun out of his pocket, pointing it to her head and pulling the trigger.      Blood splattered onto Tord's grinning face.

   Edd felt vomit rise up in his throat. He's never seen anyone die, let alone on live Tv. It made him sick.

   If the man wasn't struggling before, he was now. Stuttering curses out and screaming till Tord hit him with the back of his gun. He lifted his chin, as if he was posing for the camera.

   "This man tried stealing food and running away with a group of rebels." Tord lined the gun up, and the mans body fell forward.

   Edd was throwing up now, his stomach emptying onto the couch. Pal and Patrick, who stood off to the side, covered in blood from the execution, had no emotion on their faces, staring off as if two people didn’t get murdered in front of their eyes.

   Tord smiled, putting his gun back on the hoster on his belt. "Oh silly me! I almost forgot.”

   Three pictures appeared on the screen, Tom felt all the color drain from his face as Edd threw up some more. "These are wanted men, a million dollar reward to their capture, Alive.” Photos of Edd, Tom, and Matt Appeared,with possible weaknesses, strengths, and more printed next to their photos.

 

Tom joined Edd I'm throwing up.

 

 

   Tom turned to Edd, clearing away the bile from his lip. "Pack everything." He said seriously.

   Edd churned and stumbled over his words. "We need to leave, right now." Tom said. "We don't have much time, pack food and water."

   Tom said, trying to be calm. Edd needed a clear head around right now. Tom looked back over to the Tv, Pat and Pal were talking about best kidnapping tips. He felt acid rise up again. No. He had to be strong. Strong for Edd, strong for Matt. They both took Tord's last betrayal the hardest. They needed him right now.

   Edd hurried in grabbing his backpack, shoving water, food, and cola in to it. His cat, Ringo, meowing from the bed. His eyes pleading. Edd cooed, his mind racing. He couldn't just leave Ringohere. The cats life means just as much as anyone else. He hesitantly pulled some water out, repacking it with his Cat. Making sure she had room to breathe. She meowed happily.

Edd met Tom back in the living room, who had his own bag on his back. Edd could faintly remember that Matt had bought it for him for his birthday. It had pink glitter all over it. Matt had gone though another phase. Edd didn't think Tom would ever use it.

"Edd." Tom's eyes were glued to the floor. "What are we gonna do about Matt?" Edds eyes brimmed with determination. Poor ginger probably didn't even know he was being hunted.

"We can't leave him, I think he's still down at the shops." Edd explained. He groaned, thinking about all the ways this could have been avoided if Matt let them carry phones, he said the radiation from them would cause wrinkles or something stupid like that. "We have to get him before the soldiers do." Tom said.

Their bodies were pumped with adrenaline after giving an inspirational pep talk, talking about justice and freedom and all that. Save their friend, skip town, take down Red Leader.

Edd was practically jumping up and down as he swung the front down open, car keys in his left hand. Only to be met face to face with two men, Pal and Patrick from the forecast. Edd froze, gripping the straps of his backpack so tight his knuckles were turning white.

"Are you Edd Gold?" Pat asked, clearly bored with the mission he was assigned. They both already knew the answer to his question.

Tom shifted behind the door, slamming it in their faces. "RUN!" He screamed as they bolted to the back of the house.

Edd eagerly unlocked the sliding glass door, only for them to be blocked by more soldiers.

Tom grabbed his hand, pulling the green clad around till they reached his room. "Tom we're running out of time!" Edd yelped, he could hear the glass breaking from their back door as they forced themselves in.

Tom ignored the yells from his friend, ripping a photo of all the roommates off the wall, revealing a lever.

Tom pulled the lever, a lab opened up. Tom told him about it when he fought Tord, but he never actually went inside. The lab was still trashed from Tom and Tord's last fight.

The door shut behind them, fully incasing them in a psychopaths lab. "Ok, pull and press everything, something in here has got to help us." Tom said, getting started on a blue button.

From outside they could hear the screams and commands coming from upstairs, no doubt they were ripping it apart looking for them.

Edd sighed, they had been at it for hours, at this point they were hitting buttons that they have already pressed, nothing was happening. The marching soldiers foot steps faintly slipped away.

   Tom broke the tense air. "Sh-Should we just stay in here?"

   Edd whipped his head around, burning holes into Tom. "What do you mean?!"

   Either Tom ignored Edds stare, or just didn't notice. "Well, clearly they don't know about this place, we could be safe for the time being." Tom hated even bringing up the idea, guilt weighing on his shoulders.

   Edd smashed his fists onto the table, making Tom jump with surprise. "WHATS WRONG WITH YOU?" Tom quickly shushed him, worried about alerting any nearby guards.

Edd took a deep breath, calming his nerves, though his murderous glare never let up.

"H-How could even think that? Let alone say it out loud!" His anger sweeping away almost as fast it came, being replaced with a sadness Tom didn't even know Edd had in him. Tom could never recall a time Edd was sad, he's always smiling. Always putting others happiness before himself. Tom didn't like this Edd.

"What about Matt, Tom? Tord will kill him." Edd said, his voice cracking. God please just let him be angry again, Tom thought. It would be easier.

Tom felt tears prick his eyes. Losing Matt, his brother. To Tord no less. He couldn't lose Edd either, but if theirs even a chance that Matt is alive, he has to take it. He will protect them.

"I-I'm sorry, your right. Let's figure something out."

Edds eyes met with Tom's, his own passion and pain showing though them. Edd's own guilt got to him, Tom's always being an asshole he almost forgot how much he cares about them. Taking his anger on Tom, it wasn’t right, but he couldn't take it back. All he can do is learn from that mistake and accept it.

They continued looking around for anything useful. Edd had clumsily fallen and tripped on a stray vile that laid on the ground. His limbs grasping and searching for anything to hold him up as he got closer to the floor, yanking down a picture of Tord. Lucky for Edd, Tom has cat-like reflexes, catching his friend before he could hit the ground.

Edd pulled himself from Tom's arms. "Good catchTommie!" Edd teased, brushing dust of his hoodie. Tom rolled his eyes. "Don't call me that."

Behind the once held up poster of Tord's face, a red button was presented. Tom scratched his head. "He has a pattern of hiding things behind wall decorations, you think we would check there first."

"Should we push it?" Edd asked. Tom groaned, feeling unsure. "Last time Tord had a red button in here, a giant robot put Jon in the hospital, almost killed us, and destroyed Tord's arm." Tom rubbed his chin, grinning. "Yeah let's do it."

Without warning, the floor started to shake again, papers, test tubes, pipes fell to the floor. A panel opened in the ceiling, sunlight gleaned in.

   Tom and Edd exchanged glances, before climbing outside into the backyard.  The air smelt like guns and smoke. They didn't care, one though was on their minds, saving Matt.

   Matt had last said he was goin to the shops to search for a new mirror, so that's were they would start. It would be so much easier if Matt allowed them to carry cell phones.

   But for now, they were searching for a Missing Matt


	3. Matt’s Secret

He was a narcissist, this he knew. Tom teased him about it often, but he wasn't hurting anyone. So what the problem?

Mirrors were always handy, being close to his person for emergencies. Mirrors covered his room corner to corner.

Early in the morning, Matt would get up and stare at himself, knit picking every little thing.

Matt pinched the little fat he had on his stomach. He purred, he looked cute with a little cub. He ran his fingers though his hair, the locks soft and wavy. Checking his height to see if he grew any, nope. Still 6'1. Everything on his body was perfect, expect one little thing.

   His smile flat-lined. Tiny freckles danced along his forehead and nose. Every morning, he prays that they would be gone, but they never leave.

   He sighed, pulling out his makeup bag. A gift from his mother. She told him that he was ugly, and his freckles should always be covered.

   A small part of him, always thought she said things like that cause she didn't love him. It was hell when he lived with his parents. Neither one was ginger, and his dad always told him that he was a mistake, and his mom called him ugly. Clearly his dad was not his dad.

   Pulling the zipper open he pulled out his expensive foundation. Only to find the bottle empty.

   He felt his breath hitch, he wanted to scream in panic. The tube was completely gone.

   How could his foundation be gone without him noticing it running low? He glanced over to the clock in the corner, it was a digital clock. Edd had gifted it to him because he couldn't read a regular clock.

   It was 9:10, if he was lucky, his roommates won't be up yet. Matt swiftly threw on his discarded purple hoodie. He looked to find his green overcoat, to find it on the ground, crinkled. Gross. Mother would turn in her grave if he wore that, and smack him silly if she was alive.

   Leaving his coat behind, he patted his pockets, making sure he had his wallet.

   He carefully made his way to the front door, being as quiet as possible just in case Edd and Tom were awake.

   Sadly, Matt's crossed fingers and prayers didn't save him, because he could smell breakfast.

   His froze, they can't see him. They would be disgusted.

   Slowly, he snuck past the kitchen. But his attempts were foiled as Tom was sitting on the couch in the living room.

   Matt wanted to scream. It wasn't uncommon for Edd to be up at the time, but Tom would almost always be asleep till the afternoon due to his hangovers. Course he picks today to get up early and be productive.

   "Hey Matt." Tom greeted, Matt stiffened, his 'eyes' never left the Tv. How did he know it was him?

   Maybe...If he hurried he could make it to the door before Tom could see him.

   Unfortunately, Edd had put a stop to his carefully crafted plan. Things are not going his way today. "Wanna help me with breakfast Matt? Tom never helps." He send a glare to the drunk, who shrugged.

Matt quickly shook his head back and forth, his hair waving everywhere. "Matt?...Did you brush your hair this morning?" Edd asked concerned.

Horror spread across his features, how could he even think about leaving the house, with not only ugly spots on his face, but not brushing his hair as well?

"Matt, are you ok?" Edd asked, stepping closer. Oh god. He could feel his knees getting weak, his eyes starting to water. Tom's eyes were no longer locked into the Tv.

Matt started sobbing right then and there. He had always been more emotional and sensitive then the others, but that didn't mean he wanted them to see him cry.

Edd hugged Matt from behind as Tom stood up from the Tv, their eyes locking.

"Matt oh my God!" He lead the sobbing ginger to the couch, forcing him to sit between himself and Tom.

"What's wrong?" Tom awkwardly asked, softly rubbing circles into his back. He never really was good at comforting people, but the fact he was trying meant everything to Matt.

Matt covered his face best he could, crying and hiccuping into his hands. Edd carefully moved his hands from his face, as if he was avoiding a full blown panic attack.

"Do y-you guys t-think I'm ugly?" Matt questioned, the sentence barley audible though the crying.

Both Tom and Edd exchanged worried and confused looks. "What are you talking about Matt?"

Matt groaned. "You know what I'm talking about Edd! Don't play dumb!"

Tom laughed, "Yea! Thats Matt's job!" Edd gave him a glare that shut him up.

"Wait...Are those freckles?" Edd questioned, poking his cheek.

Matt broke out into another fit of tears.

Tom had found the problem. "Matt why are you self conscious of your freckles? Have you been covering them up all this time?" Tom asked, trying to not be himself, and try to be a supportive friend.

"BECAUSE THEIR UGLY!" Matt shouted, attaching his hands to his face again.

"I don't think their ugly." Edd said, being completely honest. Matt peeked his eyes out from between his fingers. "...Really?"

Tom shrugged, taking a swig of his flask. "If anything, their kinda cute, cute for you anyway."

 

 

Matt never wore makeup again.


	4. Movie Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tom, Edd, Matt, and Tord have a night once a week all to themselves. 
> 
> I DONT SHIP THE REAL LIFE COUNTERPARTS.

   Bring a teenager meant a lot of things. Acne, mood-swings, that one emo phase nobody talks about, and the fact you have no real control of your life. Sure you can give suggestions, but you never really do have the final say. Your parents keep a watchful eye on you, well, most anyway; and your a prisoner to the steel grip of school.

   So spending time together, all four of them, really was a privilege. They have one night a week, that's all theirs, and that is movie night.

   Tord and Matt day in the outside of the couch, while Tom and Edd cuddled between them.

   "Matt, scoot over, you're squishing me!" Tom said, lighting pushing the tall ginger away.

   Matt purred, shoving closer, cuddling Tom between himself and Edd, who gladly warmed up to the touch and did the same. "Now your both doing it!" He growled. "Stop it!"

   Edd smiled, burrowing his head into Tom's chest.

   Another figure entered the living room, stuffing the snuggling boys, thinking they have been caught, until Tord's whinny voice told them it was safe. "You're cuddling without me?!" He shouted, throwing the bowl of popcorn he had into the air; jump across his boyfriend, crushing them as they let out a oof sounds, the air being knocked out of them, popcorn rained down on their knit bodies.

"Damnit Tord! Now I'm all buttery!" Tom complained, pushing him off.

Tord rolled his eyes, getting up and putting his favorite movie on.

"Oh! We should watch Matt on Matt action!" Matt said, he requested this movie every time, and I was always the same answer, no. Nobody really knew how he found such a movie, but nobody entertained him by watching it.

"We should watch the documentary of Cola!" Edd said, respectively drinking the Cola in his hand, as if he was giving some kind of tribute.

   "We watched that last week! We should watch a Shipmen's Wealth!" Tom said, flicking the leftover popcorn off his lap and onto the floor.

   "That movie has too many harpoon." Tord cringed. "Twice, it's my turn to pick." Edd and Tom groaned, knowing the exact movie Tord planned out.

   "What movie?" Matt asked, it really wasn't a surprise that he had forgotten Tord's favorite movie, the same movie he picks every time. "Insane Zombie Pirates from Hell 6!"

   Tord put the film on, jumping into his spot next to Edd, who threw a blanket over their bodies. They huddled together, enjoying the warmth.

   "Aren't you scared your mom will come in?" Matt asked, clinging onto his boyfriend like his life depended on it, squeezing the air out of Tom.

   "Nope." Tord said, popping the P because he knew it annoyed Tom. "My parents won't be back till tomorrow morning." They all visibility relaxed.

   None of their parents knew about their relationship, thinking that they were just good friends, when they really were more. Edds Family was the only ones who knew and accepted them completely. Then finding out was not supposed to happen. Ms. Gold had walked in on movie night, to find Matt and Tom kissing while Edd and Tord actually watched the film holding hands. Their just glad they didn't tell anyone.

   Tom's parents are homophobic, and Matt's mom would kill him. Tord knows his dads wouldn't care, but he's just not ready to tell them yet.

   Once the film started, Matt fell asleep almost immediately, snoozing on Edds shoulder. Tom talked through the whole thing, causing Edd to hush him angrily most of the movie. Tord smiled, watching the ying-Yanr of their love. He wouldn't trade movie night for anything.


	5. Monsters Under Your Skin

My body was dry heaving. Trying to expel something, anything. But my stomach was empty, the proof was the nasty smelling puddle on the side of my bed. Twice, expelling a demon can't be that easy.

A large purple tail formed, ripping though my black jeans. I clutched my forehead, newfound pain climbing up my body. I wailed as blood ran down my face, dripping and watering my eye sockets. I blinked the red fluid away, trying to gain my senses. Two large horns grew out my head.

Creating and breaking my bones in the process. Any other person would pass out, their body not being able to handle the trauma. But I can't, no matter how badly I want too, he won't let me.

He likes my pain, finds it funny actually. Laughing and taunting me inside my own brain. My screams, whines, and pleading, it was like his own Tv show.

My teeth shifted, pushed around, and knocked out to make room for two growing fangs. I spat out some loose teeth, can't tell you which ones they were, but I do know they shouldn't have come out.

My howls became low-throated cries, as the intense, body changing transformation was complete.

I sniffled, pulling myself off the ground, looking down at my own pool of blood and leftover skin, gross.

My hoodie was torn to shreds, not able to keep up with my new body.

I carried myself to the door, my body adjusting to the newfound weight of muscle and bones.

Thank god Edd and Matt weren't home, because they can't know. "It's only a matter of time before you snap." I growled, trying to make some form of intimation. He didn't seem to be scared.

He was right though, no matter how much I didn't want to admit it. Soon I would get angry enough, they would see my monster. Hell, I transformed because I couldn't find my extra bottle of alcohol.

I quickly grabbed a loose paper from my desk, writing down a half-witted excuse about why I was moving out, and why I can't tell them in person.

Tears dropped onto the paper, making a little stain. I dropped the notebook sheet on my bed. I could hear the demon laughing again, knowing that I agreed with him, and that one sentence from his mouth is causing me to leave my family behind.

I walked outside, people screaming in fear, calling 911, grabbing their children and running away.

They can't know. I would rather live in the woods by myself and alone with only the demon in my head to keep me company, or to die at the hands of Tord, then tell them the truth.

 

The truth of Tom Redwell.

 

 

Sorry this is so short. I wrote this during class.


	6. I Would Die for You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tom x Edd.

   Tom rubbed his mouth with his sleeve, his coughing fit finally over. Green and blue petals decorated his room. He never bothered cleaning up the flowers, they usually disappear in a hour or two, he'll clean up the blood later.

   A gross heavy feeling swelled in his gut. He cringed, as soon as he throws them up, new flowers replace them almost immediately. He was getting worse.

It went from throwing up one a week, to everyday, and now, their isn't a time when he leaves his room. He was dying.

It scared him, but soon, it will get so bad he won't be able to throw them up fast enough, and he'll choke on his own love.

He felt another wave coming up, and he hesitate to spit them out. He learned that holding them in was just a painful experience. Petals stuck to his throat, the roof of his mouth, and between his teeth. But it was hell of a lot worse if he tried to fight it.

A soft knock on his door put a smile on his face. Matt always made him feel better. He was the only one who checks on him, he pushed everyone else out.

Matt slowly walked in, carrying a plate of pancakes, blueberry. His favorite. He knew they were specially made for himself, Tord was allergic and Edd hated them.

"Hey Tom." He was unfazed by the state of his room, he was unfortunately used to it. Matt was the only person he let inside. Seeing Edd just made him worse, and he just flat out hates Tord. Twice, Matt can relate to him, he had the illness as well.

He tried telling Tord how he felt in the beginning, but it didn't work out. Matt couldn't do it. So he just had to removed, he can't remember Tord's name half the time.

Tom didn't want to forget Edd, he would rather die. He just might. The flower stem was too big in his lung to remove now anyway, he let it grow too big.

Matt set the plate down, sitting down next to Tom, tracing the vine that held onto his neck. Tom smacked his hand away, he hated when he did that. It was going to grow and tighten, and eventually it will kill him. It's like a noose he can't get rid of.

Matt sighed, starring at a puddle of Tom's flowers on the ground. "How long ago did you eat last?"

Tom shrugged, it hurt to use his voice, and he honestly didn't know the answer to that question. Everything he ate got thrown up anyway.

"Tom I'm worried about you. You haven't left your room in days. Edd's worried." Tom threw up again. "Please, just come out of your room for a little while." He begged, he was crying now.

He coughed up the last remains of petals. "Why are y-you c-crying?" It came out scratchy and forced, few stay flowers dipped out his mouth.

"Tom! Why woul-would you a-ask that?! I don't want y-you to die! If Edd found out this is how you died, he would hate himself!"

Tom sighed, breathing in this new information. He's 21 years old, does he really want to die in his gross sweaty bedroom? He doesn't want Edd to live with this guilt anyway.

Standing up, he threw on his blue hoodie, making sure to cover up the vine around his neck. He waited at the door for Matt, who gladly followed.

Matt lead Tom down the stairs, who broke into a coughing fit. Losing his balance, he rolled down the stairs and hitting the ground with a loud thump. "Oh my god! Tom!" Matt rushed down, helping Tom stand up.

The vine squeezed, cutting off his air supply. His body squirmed and spazzed, desperately clawing at his neck. Tord and Edd ran in, hearing the thump and whining. Flowers poured out Tom's mouth and nose.

Hearing Edd's voice caused the vine to grip tighter. Tom nails dig into his skin, trying to break the vine under his skin.

His eyes locked with Edd's as he screamed at Tord to call 911. He stopped struggling, his body still sizing out. This is fine. Throwing up, screaming, suffocating, it was all worth it. As long as he ended his life starring into Edd's brown pools that they call eyes. They were beautiful, unlike Tom's. His eyes were gross, black, disturbing. Edd and Matt screeched bloody murder, crying and hugging Tom's limp body. Tord sat in the corner, his own tears escaping him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Should I make a good end?


	7. How the Good Times Have Passed

"I really didn't have many friends when I was younger." 

"You have brought up a man named Edd a few times, was he your friend?" Dr. Chuck asked. Tom heaved, the telltale sign of a breakdown. Once Tom started crying, the session was basically over. He would refuse to talk, to do anything really. Just sit there, an empty look in his eyes. Chuck knew he was trending on thin ice, so he quickly changed the subject. If Tom froze up know, he wont get anything from him. "Lets talk about your childhood. What friends did you have?"

Tom looked off, but told him anyway.

Tom didn't like the kids in his class. They were mean. At first, they would call him names, physically hurt him. His teacher, Ms. Gulburt, put a quick stop to it. After that, they would just ignore him. That hurt worse then the names. Nobody would talk to him, he was alone. The harsh social interaction was quickly missed. Every once and a while, a side remark of being a freak, or loser would sneak by, and Tom needed to know. What made him different from the other kids? Why was he the freak? A particularly hard day sent him to the bathroom mirror. He inspected every single part of his body, judging every little flaw at such a young age. He knew right away what made him different, his eyes. Jakob had blue eyes, Mike had brown, hell, a girl in his class had pretty green eyes. His were an ugly black. Disgusting. No wonder nobody wanted to sit with him. 

Since that day, Tom knew his place. A freak of nature. He deserved to be alone. He lived this way till the first day of 4th grade. Tom lived in a small town, everyone knew everyone. So when a new kid dressed in green came to school, it was a little strange. They haven't had a new student in what seemed forever. "Everyone, this is Edd Gold, he just moved here from the states! I trust you all will be kind." The teacher interduced him. She told him to sit wherever he would like. Tom felt himself run cold when Edd smiled and made his way over to him in the very back of the classroom. "I like your eyes," He said, taking Tom back even more then he already was, nobody had ever told him that before. "My name is Edd!" Tom wanted to snap at him, he already knew his name! The teacher JUST said it moments ago. But he didn't. This is the first peer who has talked to him willingly in years without pulling some kind of cruel prank. "I-Im Tom." He greeted

The whole class was gwaking at the boys, including the teacher. If Edd saw, he didnt show it. Ms. Lake coughed, but conutied the lesson none the less. Edd scooted closer to him, leaning over his shoulder and spying the doodle Tom had drew on the desk. Has he ever heard of personal space? Tom winced, expecting him to rasie his hand, tattle to Ms. Lake. He didnt, but smiled yet again. Did this kid ever take a break? "Thats a awesome drawing! I like to draw too!" He complimented. No one had ever been this nice to Tom, ever. It felt...nice.

Tom and his new friend whispered throughtout the lesson, all the way to reccess. No doubt Ms. Lake had heard them talking, but never shushed them. Tom never realized it as a child, but looking back he thinks Ms. Lake was just glad he made a friend. 

"So, why are your eyes black?" Edd asked him. The two boys sat underneth a tree near the main buiding, the place Tom would always sit for reccess, alone. It was much better to spent with someone. Normally, Tom wouldnt answer such a question, he didnt like to talk about it. But Edd was the first person Tom could truly trust, even if he along knew him for a day. "My mom was a bowling ball." Edd most definitely knew that his mother was not a bowing ball, but let Tom believe that for a couple more years. His parents were murdered in front of his eyes in kindergarden. His brain covered the trauma by making his mother and father objects instead of people. It was hard knowing the truth about what actally happened. His eyes were black because of the lazer shot that the killer made when he tried to cover his tracks by killing the witness, jokes on him, I fucking lived.

Next came Matt, he was a strange kid. And thats by Tom's standards. He was all skin and bones, sometimes Tom would be scared to touch him, afraid he would break in half. Tom never really did know the whole story, it was a sentive subject for Matt, so he never asked. All he knew, that Matt's mother was arrested for child negligence. 

Tord was the last to join gang, and the first to leave. Tom was NOT a fan of the kid. Most of the time, they stayed out of each others way. One day, under Tom's special tree, the girl with the pretty green eyes and Jakob walked up to them. He never bothered to learn the girls name, she wasnt exactly the kindest person. 

"Hey Freak!" She yelled, a deep scawl on her face. "I heard you were talking shit about me!" She got in Tom's face, making him crawl in on himself. What was she talking about? Would Edd and the others side with her? He's never really been bullied since they came to town, are they going to leave him? Is he going to be alone again?! 

"W-What are you tallking about?" He asked weakly, god he felt so tiny.

"You know what im talking about you little pussy, if you know whats good for you, watch your mouth." She hissed. Tord stepped between them, pushing her back. "Go home bitch."

Jakob growled, marching over and yanking Tord up by the collar. Jakob was a 8th grader while they were in 7th, he was much bigger then Tord "What the fuck did you just call my girlfriend?" 

Edd coughed, "Lets ju-"

Tord spat in Jakob's face. "I called her a bitch."

Jakob swung at Tord, punching him across the face, Tord quickly punched back. A teacher came and separated them, Tord was suspended for 3 days. Tom had a new found respect for Tord. 

Tom cried, talking about Tord brought to many memories, too much pain. He couldnt do it. Dr. Chuck did his best to calm him down. "Hey, we have had a very sucessful session, why dont we work on this next time?" 

Tom nodded, letting the Dr help him out his seat, after losing his right arm, using his left had been almost impossible. Tom blindly let the man lead him back to his room, who had nothing to do other then be alone. This time he knew though, no Edd, no Matt, no one is going to save him this time.

 

 

Yes, this is inspired by the Sally Face thearpy sessions, but Tom's not being held for murder. Yes, their is more parts


	8. Edd's Movie Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edd's movies nights are a bit different from when they were teenagers, but they always end the same way.
> 
>  
> 
> Guys I'm so sorry for this shitty chapter, I will improve it and make my work better next time

Edd's annual movie nights happened every Saturday evening. Everything happened in a set row of event. Firstly, Edd would order Pineapple pizza and make popcorn with their favorite seasoning. Tom would always show up to Edd's apartment first, then they would both go drag Matt to the room, either he forgot or got busy with a mirror. They would meet back up at Edd's, then fight about the movie he picked. Matt would always want Matt on Matt, Edd picks a cola documentary, and Tom would want anything but those two over watched movies. Then Edd would bring out the food, which caused Tom to pass out in shock, so the pineapples were thrown out. After, they would all squeeze together on Edd's tiny couch, elbows would fly and Matt ends up crying about his face. So one settles on the floor, most of the time it was Tom who got to the boot. Matt would say he's too pretty to be on the ground, and Edd plays the, "Its my house! Im not sitting on the ground" Card. Halfway through the movie, Matt would start to play with Tom's hair, who would smack his hand away. Edd falls asleep first and onto Matt's shoulder. By this time, Matt would play with Tom's hair again, who is too tired to resist the gingers hold. After the movie, Tom would prop himself back on the couch, shoving Matt and Edd to make room. Even though it was hell, Saturday was their favorite day of the week


	9. Flaws

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to request!

Tom loves his friends. He truly does, just doesn't show affection like most people. Course, nobody is perfect, everyone has flaws. Although he loves his friends, sometimes he wants to stab them in the throat. Matt is a bit of a clean freak, and it pisses Tom off, who is a little messy. After a long night playing Susan at bars, not a steady job, but a paying one. Tom will come home drunk and crash straight on the sofa. Often times with a bottle in hand and a black eye from some out of control bar fight. Edd would wake him up the nest morning and bring him to the bathroom to treat his wounds. During that time, Matt ALWAYS comes downstairs and throws the half drank bottle away. ALWAYS. No matter how many times Tom has told the ginger NOT to, he forgets every time. Alcohol is not cheap, and problem solving has had no results. He tries to bring it to the bathroom, but then Edd throws it out. He used to chug the bottle before he goes inside for the night, but then the effects of the hang-over get 10x worse. Maybe it was god trying to tell him to stop his drinking problem, or the basic logic of drinking a whole bottle of Smirnoff in under an hour. He tries to hide it, but he himself forgets where it is when the hangover dries out. One time when Tom was helping Matt look for his favorite mirror, he found 4 open bottles under the sofa. Other then Matt constantly calling him Tim, Matt was pretty ok. 

Then their was Edd. He could go from a worrisome parent to a force of destruction in a second. Edd was nothing like Matt when it came to keeping the cramped house tidy. He had an unhealthy obsession with Cola, which caused the tables and floor to be sticky when Ringo knocked the can over. His art supplies would be left all over the house, and just pile up over time. He would yell at Tom for drinking when the amount of Cola he would consume in a day couldn't be any better. Whenever the mailman mixed up Edd's and Edwardo's Cola orders, he would absolutely lose his mind. At this point, they think the mailman mixes up the orders on purpose to see the two battling houses argue, a fist fight occasionally occurring.

Living with Tom wasn't easy, but he was the only one who had a job. Edd and Matt just couldn't hold one down. Edd hated waking up every day and having to treat Tom's many wounds. He knew that if he didn't, Tom would just let them get infected. Tom doesn't like to talk about what happens when he gets back from work, and Edd almost doesn't want to know. He's sure people that go to the bar at one in the morning aren't model citizens. Matt tries to help the best he can, but knows nothing about first aid, so he just ends up getting in the way. So Matt goes downstairs and searches for Tom's forgotten flask or bottle. Matt has noticed he's gotten good at hidding the bottle, he left one outside in the bushes for a while, but that quickly stopped when Edd accidentally ran it over with the lawn mower. Tom always yelled at Matt when he found it missing, but Matt plays dumb every time. Matt smiles to himself when Edd pats him on the back when Tom doesn't see. 

 

Everyone has flaws. True friends look past flaws and help you through them.


	10. Starving To Be Perfect pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING- This chapter may be a trigger subject for self harm, if you are struggling with an eating disorder people skip this

"Too heavy"  
"Out of shape"  
"Work out"

 

   I couldn't stop eating. I cant stop eating. Everything that is going into my mouth is disgusting just like me. Stop. Stop. Stop eating. Standing in front of the mirror, I looked at my messy self. Crumbs fell off my face and onto my shirt. Tears leaked out my eyes and I shoved more and more into my mouth. I only went one day with my fast, and after the full 24 hours I shoved food into my body like a pig. What would Matt and Tom think if they saw me like this? Sure I've gained some weight from quitting sports, but I wanted to focus on my studies, I'll be out of high school soon, was it so bad to want to work on my education, didn't know it wouldn't effect my body so much. I have to stop. STOP. I threw the bowl of fruit on the ground. No more food, I can go another day.

 

   Waking up the alarm was a ugly wakeup call. I threw on my green hoodie, the way it tightened around my body was gross. I'm gross. I skipped breakfast and set a 24 hour timer on my phone before heading to the bus to meet up with Tom. Matt lived halfway across town so he didn't take the same route as us. I felt kinda light headed as made my way to the stop, but wobbled my way there. I was NOT excited to get back to school after winter break, it was cold, and I didn't do a single bit of my homework. "Hey Edd" Tom said. He always beat me to the bus stop. He hated his foster home, he said Ashley was really pushy about him calling her mom. He didn't like that.  
   "Hey Tom, what's up?" I asked him, my stomach growled. God I'm already hungry?  
"Eh, didn't do any work, Ms. McDonald is gonna be pissed I didn't do my book report."  
   "Same."  
Tom raised an eyebrow, "You always do your homework, what's wrong? And you didn't answer any of my calls, and when I went to your house you never answered your door? Are you mad at me?"  
   Crap. He knew that Tom would be upset after ignoring him for a week. "I've been...Busy"

 

   Tom was not going to let this go, but Tom respected my space. The bus pulled up and we sat in our usaual space, lucky number 13. Of course at the next stop Edwardo and Jon would set on and sit right behind them. Mixing Edwardo and Tom was never good, it would often end as a fist fight. The school actally gave them a no contact order, but it doesnt pull into effect until they pull up to school grounds.

 

   "Hey losers, you do your homework?"  
"We are not giving you answers Edwardo" Tom snapped, turning around and flipping him off. Edwardo sunk into his seat and grumbled.. Guess hes got too much of the Monday blues to brother them.

   Once we got to the school, we went to find Matt and Tord. Soon Matt came into view, who was sucking on a lollypop. My stomach growled, I really want that sucker. Matt loved sweets, always had candy of some sort in my mouth or pocket. "Hey Matt, where is Tord?" I asked, they arrived together in the morning.  
"Oh he was sent home early for punching Mark on the bus. He got suspended for two days." Already? God he couldnt go a day.  
"Good." Tom mummbled, I lightly punched his shoulder.  
"Oh come on Tom, you havent seen him in a week, wouldnt it be nice to say hello?" I asked smugly.  
"I saw him yestesday, just because you have been ingoring us all break doesnt mean me and Matt arent gonna hang out, Matt would just invite him along." Ouch, guess it wouldnt been reasonble to expect them to wait for me after I blocked myself away.  
"Yeah, why were you locked up in your house Edd?" Matt asked.  
"Don't bother Matt, he wont answer truefully, I already tried." Wow, rude much Tom?  
"O-Oh..." Oh? Thats all he had to say? Thanks a lot Matt.

   Both their phones buzzed, Tom groaned, pulling it out his back pocket. "Its probley just Mike bugging me again." A gross feeling stettled in my body, I peeked over Matt's shoulder to see a text msg from Tord. He had a slit lip and a cocky smile on his face, posing for the selfie. The capation said, "Taught Mark a lesson". Tom quickly threw his phone away, elbowing Matt to do the same, who shoved it in his backpack. I felt my body fill with sadness, they kicked me out the groupchat?

   Tom changed the subject. "This sucks, its like 30 degrees outside and I have to walk to Math out in the cold." He pouted.  
"Why didnt you wear your hoodie?" Matt asked. It was a question I waned myself honestly, he would always have that blue jacket with him, so why not today?  
"Mike and Ashley were pissing me off, I wanted to get out the house as soon as possible, guess I fogot it in all the rush." Ah, foster parents. Tom was not a fan.  
   I looked at my green hoodie on my own body, I had Bio first, which was inside the heated main building, so I wouldnt need it, right? Twice, it will fit Tom's small frame better then my fat body anyway.  
   "Here." I said, pulling the warmth off and over my head and handing it to Tom. "I dont have class outside, you can wear it." I could feel the harsh cold from outside as students opened and closed the main doors, I almost wanted to yank the hoodie back from Tom's hands and pull it back over my body to protect from the winter air flooding inside. It didnt help that I felt so, naked.  
   "Edd..."  
The bell rang, cutting Tom off effectivly, almost as convenient as an 80s teen pop movie. Peers shoved their way through the group, aiming to get to class. I shrugged, Tom and Matt were pushed in the other direction. I hugged my body, making my way towards Bio.


	11. In Sickness and In Health

   Its silly too think that they wouldn't get sick. They were alone, all they had was each other in the dark cell. The three rebels only got feed once a day, its not like it was a 5 coruse meal. They would get a loaf of bread that they woul split among themselves with a cup of water for each. Every single day their bodies would fill with more and more regret. This was no way to live. Tom has officially gone blind, so Matt and Edd have to help him eat. Matt sits in the corner and throws up for hours on end. Mostly stomach acid and blood since he had no food in his belly. It wouldn't be long till he died at this rate. Edd can no longer walk. The total lack of vitmeans has taken a toll on his legs, he just doesn't have the streath to stand up. Whenever they told the guard that they needed medical attentain, he woul scaff and light another cigarette.  
   "Eat Rebels." The guard said, opening the metal door, light slipping in and hurting their eyes. He tossed the tray on the ground, the contents spilling everywhere. He laughed before slamming the door shut again. Edd and Matt crawled over, trying to the save the water before it all touched the ground. They equally slit the bread, helping Tom with whatever they could in the pure dark. Matt gagged, running back to his side of the cell and threw up again.  
   "W-What, w-what are we going to do?" Matt asked, whipping his mouth with his torn sleave. His voice was scruffy, nobody has talked in about a week, no words were needed to be said. Its been months, maybe a year of zero contact with the outside world. They were done with death threats, done trying to eacape, done with begging. They were just, done.  
   "What c-can be done?" Tom snapped. He was filled with so much rage, he hated it here, he hated the red army, he hated Tord. "We are going to die here." He mumbled.  
   "To think we ended up this way." Edd gruffyly laughed. "We lead the second biggest Army in the world, only to be fooled by an old friend."  
   "He was never my friend." Tom said. Edd woundered if Tord felt the same way about all of them. They don't remember much of the outside world, or what happened when they were captured. All they could recal was getting a preace treaty signing from the Red Army, asking to meet with top leaders across the world for settlement, and the Green Army was invited. Tord wanted control of the main conutries, and agreed to spare their lives if they handed over Tom, Edd, and Matt. They never made it to the meeting. The plane they were in was shot down, and the three were kidnapped by Red Army souilders. So the treaty never came into effect, and Tord contuied his killing spree. Well, what Edd guessed  
Tord never even came to see them, they weren't even worth the teasing. Tord never stopped by, Edd guessed that by tomarrow, they would die.

 

 

 

 

   "Red Leader?" Pat questioned, stepping inside, holding a large bundle of papers. Red Leader glared at his right hand man, dropping his pen on his stack of paperwork.  
   "I told you not to disturb me unless you found anything new." He snapped. "Now get out, I have work to do, tell the west base to get ready to march in to Amercia. I know those Amercians have them, or know what happened."  
   "Red Leader, I do have news, and London is the one who has them, the leader of the Green Army are still alive." Tord snapped his head up, quickly making his way out the door and speed walking towards the main control room. Pat followed closly behind.  
   "Go find Paul, you two are coming with me on this mission." He said, pushing the privites out of the way who were working on the control equitment.  
   "You are joining us on the attak Sir?" Pat asked. Tord hasn't joined them in such a risky mission since the zombie outbreak at at ASDF Land.  
   "Yes, this is personal now. The Queen told me she had nothing to do with the missing plane nor the whereabouts of my friends, that's the only reason England is still around, I want a full attack and takeover, I want shoilders on the ground, and we are going to question the officals and kill the Queen." Tord said, prepping the announcement.  
   "Sir, are you sure that's the best plan?" Pat asked, worried about the possible consqences. The Red Army controls more then half the world, but spared a few conturies that swore loyality, places like Amercia and China are under their thumb, if they were to kill a supposed ally, then they might get worrisome.  
   "YES! NOW DO AS YOUR TOLD!" Tord yelled, pointing out the door. He didn't have much time. They have been missing for two years, they could already be dead.  
   Pat stumbled out the door, likely to be looking for Paul to get ready for the upcoming battle. Tord sighed, clicking the botton on the intercom. "This is Red Leader. New information has come in about the betyal of London, we are getting ready to assnatie the queen, the downfall of England is near." Tord straghted his back, getting genral Comes on the mic to explan the plan of attack. Sometimes he felt like his job was just to be a mascot, give the word and someone else takes care of the small things.  
   He marched through his base, grabbing his favortie gun, the gun hes going to kill the Queen with. It was almost funny she thought she could lie to him and get away with it.  
   Tord let Pat and Paul pick men to aid them in the battle, he trusted they would take care of it while he too care of the war plans.

 

 

   Tord clunched the man just the thoart, slamming him into the man into the wall yet again. The shoilder cried out as pressure was appailed his wounds. "Plea-Please." He moaned. "You al-already won. W-What do you w-want from me?" He asked. His vosice was so quiet and pained, Tord was surpried he could even hear him. It was true, Red Army now controlled London. Another conutry to add to the list. The Queen was dead, the people fled. Unliky for this poor man, he didnt run fast enough.  
   "I want to know where Edd Gold, Matt Heaves, and Tom Redwell are." Tord snapped. Holding a bloody knife, stained with British men, up to his jugular. "If you don't tell me, I will kill you and some else will."  
   The Brit cried, tears leaking down his face. "I'm only a private! I have no idea where they are, thats Classified information! I-If I co-could tell y-you, I would!" He sobbed, Tord almost felt bad.  
   "Then you are no longer use to me." Tord dragged his knife across his skin and let his body fall to the floor. Tossing the dirty knife behind, he called his guards to follow behind and went to look for Pat who was digging in the offices. If it was classified information, Pat has likely found it. Marching in, his men saluting as he passed by.  
   "Pat! Paul!" He called, they both turned and gave him their attention immediately. "Have you found anything?" He commanded.  
Both turned and looked at each other worrly. That was NOT a good sign. "Well sir, we caught this man." He pointed at a British Soldier, "But he burned all the files before we could get to them." Pat and Paul, along with all the other men in the room backed away as the Leader clunched his fist tightly, banging down on the desk.  
   "WAKE HIM UP!" Pat rushed, yanking the unconscious man up on his feet, while Paul punched him in the face, jerking him awake.  
   "w-Where am I?"  
   Tord pulled his gun out of his hoster, aiming it between the eyes. "I don't have time for this, you tell me what I want to know or I'll fucking kill you." The man looked surpried for a second, the smirked, spiting in Tords face. Everyone in the room gasped, never seeing Red Leader treated with such disrespect. And live.  
   "I would never tell somene like you anythng." Tord shrugged, shooting him in the foot. He screamed at the gunshot, trying to pull free from Pat's grasp, with no luck.  
   Tord was nowhere near done, Paul handed him a knife. Guess what they say is true, friends seem to read your mind. He slapped the mans hand on the table, making sure Pat still had him restranted. The man hollowed and wailed as Tord slolwly cut his finger off, the knife was no where near sharp enough to cut through bone, which made it even better because he had to look at his half-sliced pinkie bleed all over the desk.  
   Tord smiled, whispering in his ear, "Are you ready to talk?"  
   Even through the pain, the man shook his head, not finding the strength to talk himself. Still, a tough man to break. Most would beg and pled to let go, not even make it far enough to miss a finger. Tord rolled his eyes, he'll get his answers one way or another. "Stap him to the table."  
   The leader watched as they handcuffed him down on his back, making sure he made no way to eascape. Tord roughly shoved his forehead on the desk. Trailing the knife around on his face. He squirmed away from the touch, but had nowhere to go. "You are going to answer my questions, or I'm going to cut your eyes out, if you still don't wanna talk, I'm going chop your dick off." Tord could feel him shiver, but still kept his mouth shut.  
   Guess he has to do things the hard way. Tord kept pushing down on his head to try and keep the man still, and aggressively shoved the knife in his eye over and over again. He screamed, kicking his legs, most people looked away in the room, unable to stomach the sight of their leader shanking this man. Tord loosed the eye with his bare hands, then pulled it out of its socket, the man wiggled some more, so Tord stabbed his nerve again until he stopped struggling. But he couldnt stop the painful twitchs. Tord got a good grip on the mans eye, then started to cut the eye from the optic nerves, offically cutting his eye out. he wimpered out, in too much pain to scream anyone. Tord laughed, rolling the eye in his hand, making sure he could  see, then tossing the eye like a ball to one of the weaker stomach men in the room, who threw up.  
   "You ready to talk? Or do I need to move onto the right eye? I wont be as gentle this time." Blood ran down his face from his socket, it was almost ironic as he got blood in his only eye.  
   "YES! P-PLEASE YES." He cried.  
   Ok, now things were moving. "Where is Edd Gold, Matt Heaves, and Tom Redwell?" Tord asked, finally, real progress was being made.  
   "In the N-Northwest Wing!"  
   "Wait! Their in this building!"  
   He nodded viciouly, like that would save him. He did tell him what he wanted to know, so Tord supposes mercy is in order. He quickly shot the man in the head and rushed out the door towards the Northwest cells.  
   Pat and Paul followed him while the rest took care of the mess he left behind. They had no problem getting to the cells, as they made sure that everyone was dead.  
   Their was only one cell, it was fully blocked off, no outside light to get inside, and no way to open it without a key. Lucky for them, they snatched the key from the dTord ead guard that was on duty.  
   Tord carefully opened the door, almost scared of what he would see. It was not a pretty sight. Tord had to move fast or they would die. Matt was laying in a pool of his own blood, Pat radioed for a medic and carried him out. Tom was sitting on the ground in the dark crying. Tord cant recal the last time hes EVER seen Tom cry "He's going to fucking die!" He yelled."Help him you fucks!" Tom snapped, looking foward. It didnt really seem like he was really 'looking' though.  
   "Tom, its me." Tord said, prepared that he would jump up and attack him.  
   "Tord?...YOUR JUST NOW COMING DOWN TO SAY HI AFTER ALL THIS TIME! YOU COMMIE."  
Tord stiffened, a stone glare on his face. "Tom...I really did try, I did everything I could to look for you guys." How dare he snap at him? After hes come to help them escape?  
   "Wait, you werent the one who locked us in here?" Tom asked confused.  
   "No, I wouldnt do that."  
   Tom stood up, wobbling in the process, Tord caught him before he could fall. "I'm blind, but otherwise fine,  but Edd wont wake up!"  Tom yelled, gripping onto Tord, the only human warmth hes felt in quite a while. 

   Tord passed Tom to Paul who picked him up and ran to join Pat. Tord followed suit with Edd in his arms and out of the dirty jail that had been their home. Tord willed himself to go faster, Edd felt light. REALLY light. It scared him.

   The medic quickly checked over their bodies, and demanded they be sent to a more stable area, Edd passed out because his body couldn't handle the stress from starvation, Matt was deathly sick, but had a 80% chance of survival, and Tom was forever blind. He's never really liked Tom, but they had to pull his eyes out for treatment. It reminded him of what he did to find them in the first place. They weren't gonna happy about it, but until the war is over, they were to stay at Tords side. Even Tom, Pat and Paul will most likely to be doing his babysitting.  
They gave Tom a visor to help him see, Matt had many, MANY surgeries, and made sure all three of them gained weight, equally Edd.

 

 

   Things will be just like old times...


	12. No Self Hate is Greater Then Your Own

   Everyday, I felt more and more hate towards my body. Nothing quite fit right, something was missing. I just couldn't figure it out. Some days, I look at myself and feel happy. Others, if a mirror even came inside view I gagged a little. I want to feel happy. Not just 25% of the time. All the time.

   I don't like to be alone. Bad thoughts play in my mind if I'm alone, So company with Matt and Edd was always welcomed. Even if Matt was a little scatter brained.  They kept me sane, stable. I'm scared of what would happen if I was alone for too long. My head seems to take control, tell me disgusting things about myself and those around me. The beast. He talks to me, taunts me. Its harder to hear him over alcohol though, my lucky flask always helps. I don't really know anything about the beast, he's only fully come out before when Edd got his super powers, sure a few monster traits appear here and there like horns, or the purple tail. Nothing to big, and nothing I couldn't hide. Ever since though, I've been trying to figure out exactly HOW the beast came to be, and did he trigger the first time? Its scary not knowing when its going to happen, and I cant tell Edd. 

   Matt walked in on it once. Not the full transformation, but fangs, horns, tail, he didn't take it well. The first thing he did was scream. A girly screech, It blared in my eardrums like a dog whistle. It was awful. I painfully clenched my ears, trying to bring down the ringing. Then he ran. I've never been a runner. I was actually pretty lazy. Back in highschool, Matt used to do track. He was fast, and the only reason he took it was to, 'impress the ladies'. So to my surprise, I had no trouble chasing him and throwing him to the floor, a lot harder then I meant to. He cried and begged for me not to hurt him. He honestly had no idea it was me, and he was scared shitless. Seeing in such a mess on the floor, after I threw him there, hurt my heart. I shushed, trying to bring him back from his hysterical state anyway I could. After a while, he came too, dumb folded. "T-Tom?"

   What was I supposed to say? 'Hey! Its one of your best friends! By the way I have a killer monster inside me that I don't know how to control! Did I mention that he talks to me about mass murder daily?' Matt had questions, dancing around the truth wasn't lying? Right?

   "Y-Yeah, its me."

   "W-what hap-happened to you?" He asked, his eyes filled with panic, like I might throw him again.

  "I...I don't know, this just sort of..happens sometimes."

   I asked him not to tell Edd, and that I was sorry for manhandling him. He laughed it off, but I knew he was scared of me. After that night, he was always scared of me. Choosing to sit on the other side of the table, laying on the floor instead of the sofa with Edd and I on movie nights. He no longer annoyed me with his stupid ideas and antics.I never thought I would miss them. I never thought it hurt so much. Edd most have nocited, but not say anything, just maybe have dismissed it as another Tord situation and I just got fed up with Matt. I was not fed up with Matt. I missed Matt. He never talked to me unless Edd was around. Matt didn't view me as a friend anymore, he viewed me as a monster.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ok even though this is a short chapter, I still love it. I am really proud of this one


	13. Starving To Be Perfect pt 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING- EATING DISORDER
> 
> Slight Tomx Edd

   Going through Bio without my hoodie was hard. Harder then it should have been. I felt as if everyone was starring at my fat rolls, judging me silently. Which was almost worse then upfront teasing. I couldn't focus on his work without it. It just didn't real right.

   I jumped out my seat when the bell rang. My next period was English, which I shared with Tom. I needed my cover, I need it now. Shoving my through the crowd and running to the other side of school grounds. Once I got free of the smelly grips of much needed deodorant raiding from my peers, I went straight to my desk. Tom was not here yet. I held my arms tightly against my stomach. 

   When Tom came in, wearing my clothing. I couldn't help but smile. He looked cute with it hanging off his body. I shook those thoughts away, faking a grin. "Hi Tom." I greeted. I wanted to yell, rip the hoodie off and cuddle with it. 

   "Hey Edd." He sounded, sad. Much more of a depressing demeanor then his attitude this morning. Tom pulled the jacket off, giving it to me. I didn't wait even a second to put it on. 

   "Thanks." I mumbled. 

   "The teacher isn't here." Tom said. "Wanna skip before Ms. McDonald gets here?" He asked, throwing his backpack back on. 

   I looked at him with surprise. "Skip? Dude our book reports are due today." I said, looking at him confused.

   "Not like we did them." I couldn't argue with that. I shrugged, getting up and following him out the door. We sunk out through the back way parking lot where the staff parks. It was really easy to skip, Tom and Tord were kinda the pros at it. We walked down the trail, neither one of us felt the need to talk, not like we had anything to say.

   "I'm sorry." Tom said. "I shouldn't have left you out the group chat. I should have known something was wrong." His eyes glued to the floor, avoiding contact with Edd, scared he would see his shame. 

   What did he mean? Nothing was wrong. "What ar-"

   "Edd don't." Tom cut me off, clearing he was frustrated. Sighing, he took a seat on the trails bench. "Look, I know what your going through, I ost my mother by it, I cant lose you to it." It?...Oh. He knew.

   I could feel tears building up. I didn't want anyone to know. "T-"

   "SHUTUP!" Tom screamed. I took a step back, shocked by his sudden outburst. Tom groaned, sticking his hands to his face. "E-Edd im sorry." I took a seat next to him, to think I should be the one upset by this. It was so unlike Tom to break down. It was cruel, selfsh to put Tom through this again. His mom died less then a year ago to an eating disorder, how could I not even consider my best friends feelings. No, he was more then that. "Im sorry I snapped, I-I just care about you Edd."

   I smiled, "Tom I understand, I'm the one who should be sorry."

   "Promise me."

   "Wh'"

   "Promise me Edd, swear I wont lose you. Get help, please, for me." Tom begged, wiping his face.

   "I Promise." We leaned closer, my lips softly brushing Tom's.

   Our faces grew bright red, quickly pulling apart. A goofy grin was on Toms face.

   "Lets go to my house, drink some Cola." Tom said, "You can tell me what you've been doing stuck up in your room."

   I handed Tom back my hoodie, it looked better on him anyway. "I'd like that."


	14. Not according to Plan pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deals with abuse. If you are sensitive to these things, Please skip.  
>  I actually felt sick writing this

  Matt never thought much about the arts. Even though Tom and Edd were in a band together. He never felt the need too. His father was extremely harsh abut his grades. Telling him constantly that he needs to uphold the Heaves name. His father didn't like him much. Matt was not a very smart boy. That's what father said anyway. Mary would always tell him that he was not a fish climbing a tree. Matt never understood what that meant, but knew mother was trying to tell him something important. 

   One day, the ginger came home with a math test, a large F written in red on the front. Matt didn't want to go home. Bad things happened if he failed a subject. He tried to go Tord's house, but his dads said no since it was a school night. And tom and Edd had band practice. Matt didn't want to see his father.

   Walking into the empty house was scary, he knew his father was in his study, reading the email Ms. Gates sent home. She started personally chatting with Mr. Heaves when Matt refused to have his failed Math test signed by a parent. Mary used to sign them in secret when Mr. Heaves wasn't around. She learned her lesson when Mr. Heaves found out. 

   Matt felt his stomach drop has the maids and butlers sent him looks full of pity, as they cleaned up a vase that had thrown against the wall, no doubt by his father. He had another one of his famous fits again when he read that email. 

   "MATTHEW!" A voice boomed from down the hall, Mr. Heaves got sick of waiting for his son to hurry up and get to his office. Matt froze in his spot, dropping the test to the ground as he father turned the corner, his face beat red and angry.

   "Y-ye?" Mr. Heaves slapped him, grabbing his wrist and dragging his 10 year old son away from prying eyes of the commoners. This was an issue to be handled by the Heaves family. 

   Tears leaked from Matts eyes as he was carried away like a limp noodle. Mr. Heaves slammed the door behind them, his mother was already in the room.

   Mr. Heaves sighed, taking a seat. "Matthew, you are pushing me, aren't you?" He said, biting his tongue. He wanted so badly to bring out the belt again, beat the lesson into his son. Mary didn't like that, clearly Matthew wasn't learning from his mistakes by force, so other measures needs to be taken. 

   "N-No sir." Mr. Heaves laughed, making Mary and Matt flinch, afraid he would lash out again. 

   "That so?" Mr. Heaves sighed, "Where is your test Matthew?" He asked, glaring a hole into his sons head. Oh god. He dropped it in the hallway.

   "It-I dropped it in the hall.." Matt stumbled. Mr. Heaves growled, pinching his forehead. "Your so fucking annoying, why do you push my buttons? Huh? WHY." He screamed. "I GIVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU BRAT! EVERYTHING!"

   "K-Kim, please." Mary begged. She was scared that the pills weren't helping, that he would lose it again, she didn't want that. 

   Mr. Heaves groaned, mentally counting to ten, he leaning into his loudspeaker. "Kate, bring Matthews Math test into my office please." A second later, a maid rushed in holding the slightly crumbled paper. 

   Yanking it from her grip, she hurried out the room. "Explain this to me Matthew." He snapped. 

   "I-I didn't understand the questions" Matt mumbled. He laughed, a twisted laugh.

   "What do you mean! You have a private tutor! Their is NO REASON YOU SHOULDNT UNDERSTAND." He yelled, standing up, his chair making a screeching sound as it pushed back on the hardwood floor.

  "Ki-" 

   "SHUTUP BITCH!" Mr. Heaves screamed, smacking his wife into submission. It made Matt sick to look at.

   Matt started crying at the display, Tom's foster parents NEVER hit him, Edd parents got along so well, and never fought. Tords house was never like this, so why did father do this?

   "MATTHEW!" Mr. Heaves took a deep breath. "You are not going to public school anymore, you are not going to be friends with people below us, and you are gong to your room right now before I dish out a punishment."

   Matt cried, but ran out the office. Maids and workers all tried to stop and check if he was ok. But he was not ok. He was never ok after talking to his father. He didn't want to be here, he hated this house.

   Making sure his bedroom door was locked, he said in front of his dresser mirror. He didn't want any unwanted guests. Matt starred deeply at his reflection. Something had to be wrong with him. No human would do what his father does without some kind of reason. Something had to be wrong with him. Matt would spend hours alone, just sitting at looking at his reflection. Something HAD to be wrong with him. There must be a reason.

 

 

   Matt never did find that reason. 


	15. Shy

   Edd never thought their band would get so far. The only reason they started playing together was because of Tom. He had a project due for the music arts was to convince a friend or family member to start playing an instrument. Tom, after weeks of begging, Edd took up the drums. He had no idea how much fun they were. They both started bothering Tord to play something. He took up the bass like Tom. All three decided to leave Matt alone, as he was dealing with things at home. His father had just been arrested for child abuse, and Matt was trying to adjust to living with his mother. They sold the large house they has been living n, as a way to escape from old memories, and moved into town. It surprised them when Matt wanted to learn how to play something.

   Tom went first, showing him the basics of the bass. Matt dropped the bass about 5 times in their hour lesson, and splotched 2 strings. 

   Edd tried to teach him the drums, starting off easy. Matt ended up punching a hole into the main drum. Edd decided to end it their to avoid any more damage.

   Tord knew that if Tom couldn't show him the handle on the bass, then no body could, so he didn't even try. Overall, Matt was flushed, depressed, and told his friends he would pay for the damage. 

   All three felt bad, Matt basically just lost everything, and needed a distraction, badly. So Edd threw a slumber party, and made Matt the star. They got his favorite foods, pizza and strawberry ice cream. Something Matt was never allowed to have at his house when his father was around, saying Matt needed to watch his weight. They all stockpiled their allowance to buy Matt the new video game he wanted. And they all agreed NOT to bring up the band. 

   Matt shifted the backpack, adjusting the weight accordingly. This would be the first time facing his friends after breaking their stuff, which his Mother was more then happy to pay for. Matt carefully knocked on the door, Father would yell if he knocked to loud, saying it was distracting. 

   Matt could hear the screaming and yelling from Tord and Tom inside, who knows what they were fighting about this time. Edd answered the door, making the screaming stop right away, Edd had told them not to fight when Matt got there. "Hey Matt!" Edd smiled.

   Edd sidestepped so Matt could get inside. The house was kinda messy, but comfy. The house gripped him in the since of family. It made him felt welcome. Something his own home could never do. "Whats up you guys?" Matt said, smiling at his best friends.

   "Hey Matt." Tom greeted who was chilling on the sofa. He was laying slumping down strumming down on Susan, which was what Tord was fighting about. He didn't want that damn thing around with Matt, but Tom was stubborn, and didn't go anywhere without his girlfriend.

    Tord himself was stuffing his face with candy and soda, "H-Hi Matt." He said, his mouth full of snacks. Matt smiled, he could never do such things with his father around. He shook his head, but Mr. Heaves WASNT around. So he jumped down next to Tord, shoveling food into his own mouth.

   "My parents aren't home so we will be able to do whatever." Edd smirked, a plan already forming in his mind.

   "Whatever we want?" Tom smiled, placing susan off to the side. 

   The four friends spent the next two hours playing Image Dragons at the speakers limits, pumping the house full of the pop rock music that they all loved. Dancing around and partying the whole house. Tord had a lampshade on his head, While Tom did air guitar. Edd was waving his arms in the air wildy. They were all truly fools. But Something they were all ok with though.

   Matt was singing along, catching with the beat of the tune. They all sang and danced till the sun went down, taking breaks to catch their breath, only to go right back to their 4 man party. 

   A song came on, a song that Matt didn't know. "Hey Edd, who sings this?" Matt asked, since it was his playlist. 

   "Oh, a new Image Dragons song, it came out yesterday." Edd explained over the booming music. Matt nodded, trying to catch the meaning of the song and danced along.

   After the song was over, it was 2am, and they called it a night after eating some pizza and arranging sleeping places. But Matt stayed awake. Tom was sleeping on the sofa, and Tord took the other. Edd and Matt split the air mattress. Matt found the image dragons song and played it through his headphones to avoid waking up the others. 

   Once finding the words for himself, he switched from humming to singing quietly. Tord was first to wake, to hear the beautiful singing coming from Matt. He lightly poked Tom, who groaned. Halting Matts singing, scared Tom was awake, but once Tom stopped shifting he started up again. Tom then woke Edd by tapping his face with his feet. 

   They all listened to Matt's singing. When the song was over, Tom jumped up, throwing his covers off and tossing them on Tord, who growled. Matt's blood went cold when he saw his friends were hearing him sing.

   "Im sorry I woke you guys." Matt said, clearly was embarrassed about the spot he was in. 

   "Matt, that was awesome!" Edd cried, sitting up, no longer interested in sleeping. 

   "Yeah! You have a better voice then Tom!" Tord said, causing Tom to slap him. 

   "It is true though, Matt, you should be the lead singer in the band!" Tom said happily. Tom had been the leader singer since the band had started, but was more then happy to pass it on to Matt. This is exactly what Matt needed.

   "I-I don't know guys." Matt said, shifting in his seat. He was ok to sing with his friends, but Eddsworld often did shows at small parties and events, aka in front of other people. He didn't know if he was ok with that.

   "How about you just join us at practice? And you can choice to do whatever when the time comes?" Tord suggested.

   Matt thought about his options, it wouldn't hurt just to practice right? "I guess that's ok..."

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I continue this idea?


End file.
